Thursday, January 12, 2006

It's Just(Ice) Cold In The United States of Amnesia

I cannot believe that this is happening. The more things change, the more they remain the same. Or, is it a sense of deja vu all over again? Or, whatever appropriate cliche should go here.

Just about 80 days ago (October 20, 2005) I wrote about Judge Roberts (now Chief Justice) happening to forget various things he was asked about during his nomination process. Now we had Judge Samuel Alito, the latest Supreme Court nominee from the administration of George W. Bush, who can remember every dissent he has written but just cannot happen to remember that he PROUDLY belonged to a bigot organization at Princeton University. How convenient. This is a man who feels the Preisdent should have powers of an emperor. He feels blacks, minorities and women are not deserving of the jobs they get. He does not believe in one person one vote. He did not recuse himself from dealing with cases of a company he had invested money in. In other words, he is a perfectly good candidate to be on our Supreme Court! NOT!

He did save me some time.... I do not have to write a new article... just please read this one and assume I would have done a search/replace of Judge Samuel Alito for Roberts... the facts remain the same.

Extreme conservatives are being put on the Supreme Court, yet they are liars and bigots or unethical. In the 3-way system of balances in our government, we have reached the lowest point. An absolute idiot is President. The scummiest crooks comprise Congress. And, now, liars and unethical, extremist, bigots are on or on their way to the Supreme Court.

Long live the memory of the United States of America that the founders had envisaged.

So, here we go, on the supreme tragedy as we court disaster in our future as a nation free of tyranny.....

I was going to write a truly great article. But, as I've started typing these lines, I just cannot recall what it was going to be about! It's just not fair. Maybe, it's getting Just so cold, I cannot think or remember what it was.

Normally, I would worry, thinking my forgetting something interesting (even if not that important) was going to be a problem. I mean, how can I try to be a guest on a talk show or even run my own small company if I can forget things so easily? But, then, I realized, I am now living in the United States of Amnesia.

If I recall correctly (what with memory being such a fickle thing these days) I had just written a small piece about Bull In A China Shop John Bolton, President Bush' ideal candidate to represent us at the United Nations. The guy who conveniently forgot important facts when he "truthfully" filled out the forms for his nomination. The guy who is our Ambassador to the UN, an organization he hates.

A guy who cannot remember if he was ever questioned in a serious government inquiry is now going to deal with representatives from 200 countries. How will he remember WHO they are, much less WHAT country they came from, or even WHY they love or hate us?

But, then, I smiled and relaxed.

I think the world is MUCH safer if a forgetful, rude, obnoxious, power-hungry, vindictive, laughably stereotypical bureaucrat like John Bolton is an Ambassador at the lame duck United Nations, instead of being at his last job responsible for controlling nuclear proliferation.

I mean, I can imagine this President Bush going to war.... I am sorry, did I say GOING to war?... sorry, we know he and his type do not GO to war, they START wars. Anyway, I can imagine our Draft Dodger Commander In Chief starting a couple more wars, simply if Bolton forget which country is developing nuclear weapons and gives the wrong country name to Bush. Like Bush needs any help starting more wars that have nothing to do with nuclear weapons or weapons of mass destruction.

So, I really should not have made fun of Bolton. I cannot even make fun of George W. Bush either. I mean, he too is middle-aged and that must explain his forgetting Bin Laden - the man who attacked the USA on 9/11, and who had nothing to do with Saddam or Iraq.

But, there is a more sinister explanation. Some super secret enemy is attacking us, turning us into the United States of Amnesia.

Why do I say that? Well, quite honestly, I forgot why I say that. But, I can make up something that people will believe. OK, yes, yes, this is it. I am hearing from spy agencies, scientists and even my two cockatiels, that global cooling must have something to do with it. We are apparently not burning enough oil and the cleaner, cooler air is making us forgetful.

That, or the "liberal media" must be broadcasting some dangerous waves into the Washington DC area, which cause selective amnesia among the President and his team. It all started since Al Franken went on air, so he must be behind it. But, don't worry about the Democrats. They are actually not impacted. They already forgot that they were a strong political party so long ago, that there is nothing more for them left to forget.

Whatever this weapon is, Bolton was probably hit by a bolt of it. Bush probably got zapped with such weed, I mean, bicycling by weeds and bushes. Who knows who else is a target or, more likely in the current state of our society, a "victim" of this syndrome.

I have two proofs for this theory of mine.

One is that now Judge Roberts, President Bush’ rather mysterious appointee to the SUPREME Court of this great nation, was also hit by this Dreddful, (sorry, Sylvester Stallone), I mean dreadful, virus or secret weapon. These are Just(Ice) Cold Facts that we have to learn to deal with, and make up the new Roberts' Rules of Order(ly) Forgetfulness.

Justice Roberts did not remember if he was actually a member of certain conservative organizations, which the media had no problem in digging up information and proving that he belonged to. But, even more beautifully, he completely forgot, honestly, he really just forgot, that he actually was a hired LOBBYIST for the cosmetic industry.

And, he did not realize what he was doing was LOBBYING, and not “legal services.”

OK, at least, the guy is a creative enough liar to be a make-up artist. If it was funny, instead of slapstick, it could be called "lipstick comedy." But, it's not funny. Is this the man we want to be interpreting the most intricate laws and complex issues of the Constitution if he cannot tell apart lobbying and legal services? But, now, we have no choice. Justice has been served... dead, frozen, on ice, for decades to come.

Anyway, The second proof I have is……. Hmmm, what was it, let me think, errrr..... honestly, I forgot.

But, now I don't worry that I am getting more forgetful by the minute. I just try to remember that my forgetfulness should now make me a perfect candidate to be part of George W. Bush’s inner circle. Or is that square?

You tell me. You be the Judge....

But, I forget, what were we discussing?

Imran

4 comments:

Stravodore Lukos said...

Now see here, Mr. umm MR. -- Amway!

Uh, err, ummm, ahem-- 'taint necessarily so. I mean, uh, oh, well, okay, so there are a few black ops-- I mean, sheep, in every family, but that doesn't mean uh umm something, does it? Besides, it is high times that we outsourced government anyway. It's just not economical to try and run the mess from home, y'know?

Now where was I going with this???

Imran Anwar said...

Sounds like Guantanamo Bay is where you're headed if you don't shut up and be a real Patriot and shout Heil Bush! :-)

zensufi said...

Imran... you write very well, smooth and flowing. One would think the right supreme court candidate would have been choosen by now, but the battle contines left to right and back. It amazes me, that they can't find the perfect person, but then again, there really is no true democracy anywhere on the planet.

DRB said...

Reviewed Ginzburgs hearings lately?

Approved comments eh?